May 10th, 2006
astonished…berated…nauseated…
ever felt to inhale the golden light from the sky. i gladly raise myself to be brought up and witness everything right on the pillow of bronzed clouds. where was i headed to? my mind’s a mixed brew. i’m near stumbling from this crooked chair but i held my head up high. i don’t want to yield to sLeep, nor to drunkness, not even to numbness.
what is happiness? acceptance? love? is it really existing? i’m no life’s antagonist but would you call yourself human when you’re derailed? my body is warm, but my heart is cold. my hand touched my face and i felt the stinging pain. i’ve gathered my breath as i’ve swept my palm lightly over my midriff. i couldn’t utter out a cry and my eyes are too dry as well to do so. i feel humiliation and enmity.. i feel cold and hurt.. i feel pained and laughed at.. i feel aching and dying.. tsk! what wasted fool..wasted..
restlessness leads to bitter stupor.. okay, sing your heart out david bowie.. sink your heart out..
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